After thirty-eight years of “pressing on” in prayer, “Oh, what a day”!
My grandmother was an orphan and my dad acted like one. She had a huge chip on her shoulder and unknowingly passed it along to her only son. I wouldn’t have ever picked these two for my lineage, but my good and gracious Father did.
Deep seated bitterness towards my dad was never my life’s vision, but by seventeen, it was my reality. After someone explained to me the story behind Easter, I enthusiastically asked Jesus to adopt me. The result of that 1971 choice: The foundation of my bitterness was severely compromised. That day, the process of freedom began and Psalm 86:11 became a multi-decade prayer:
“Give me an undivided heart that I might fear Your name”
I was introduced to Rick Bewsher thirty-eight years later. By that time, I had made great progress following Jesus by daily “forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead” (Phil 3:14-16).
Externally, I often modeled Jesus’ lifestyle of godly relationships and equipping-based empowerment. Internally however, residual unforgiveness was a constant barrier to full freedom. Without my conscious awareness, my heart was still divided: God’s grace at war with a demonic stronghold of bitterness.
“Above all else, guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life” (Prov 4:32) is one of the Rick’s favorite verses. Accordingly, he taught me how to tend (guard) my heart: An amazing process that creates space for Jesus to be a Wonderful Counselor, highlight our place of pain and break the chains of bondage.
Oh, what a day!
Finally, a life-changing healing of my heart as I repented my deep-seated unforgiveness. And in exchange for this addiction, I experienced freedom and joy that I could hardly imagine!
Absolutely startling!
Twelve years later, Satan continues his daily efforts to undermine my freedom with his lesser gods and sometimes I bite on his bait. Fortunately, “tending my heart” is now a reoccurring habit when I stray from Jesus’ path. And each time, I am overwhelmed by the immeasurable kindness and patience of my loving God.
Today’s Strong Conviction
To the extent that my inner life reflects the Easter story of resurrection is the extent to which I can be an impactful equipping leader of Jesus’ saints after Pentecost.
Continuing to strain forward,
